On my wife's 40th
I came across this quote on a friend's timeline a week or so ago and loved it so much. I decided to save it, to post it on Heather's birthday. Then I forgot I had it. But now I remembered. Anyway, this idea of letting go of the interpretation we had of our partner as they change resonates really hard for me. It's not just a funeral for who we thought they were, but also for future hopes we held that were predicated on who our partner used to be. Which all sounds like kind of a downer, but I don't feel that way. For me, love is demonstrated when put to the test. If everything is like a choreographed honeymoon in perpetuity there would be no chance to be stretched, to be forced to grow, to learn to be open to different paths and perspectives. It would be perpetual adolescence. I'd rather grow, as painful as the process may be. When we met, Heather assumed that like herself, everyone was always in pain. Through the last 15 years as she underwent one awful medica